New release sample: THE LIVING PROOF GETS THE BLUES

 

"Now I know what you go through," he said, once the doors had closed and we were heading down the hall again to the church office.

"Who?" Daniel said.

"Lanie. With her dreams." He rested a hand on my shoulder and walked with me as I wheeled down the hall. Not an easy thing to do, but it helped that he had long arms, otherwise there was a risk of my running over his foot once or twice.

"What did you dream, exactly?"

"That door creaking, and you two coming in and looking like you were about to tell me the Grandstones finally found legitimate reasons for throwing us out of the church." He managed a coughing kind of laugh. "But it was all tied up with that Magna Magma concert he wants."

Daniel choked. That got a frown from Pastor Rocky.

The moment we walked into the front of the church office, the lights came back on. Pastor Rocky looked up at the ceiling, where one of the fluorescent tubes flickered, and his lips moved, silently counting. He shuddered when the flickers stopped, then offered us a crooked grin. 

"In my dream, the light flickered like that ten times. This was only six times, so I guess we're still safe from the Grandstones." He took a deep breath and let go of my shoulder, to move ahead of us down the hallway with staff offices on either side, to where his office sat on the end.

Off The Bookshelf: CAMP CACOPHANY, by Jessica Khoury

 

Audiobook, Audible exclusive

Narrated by Suzy Jackson

Mystwick School of Musicraft series

Fun short story, a before-the-story story.

Specifically, our heroine, Amelia, agrees to go to summer sports camp while her grandmother is on a quilt tour. Amelia knows she has no sports-related talent whatsoever, and of course, she gets paired as a bunkmate with a girl who is the ultimate athlete, and determined to win the trophy for best camper this summer. Again. Amelia is only there in a bargain with her grandmother, before her big audition to get into Mystwick.

However, she faces several problems from day one: no magical/musical practice is allowed on camp property. Amelia's bunkmate seems to have an antipathy toward music/magic. Everything she does goes wrong.

Bigger problem: magic is stirring, making the athletic equipment throughout the camp go crazy, then dangerous. But there is no music to be heard, and magic needs music to work. So what is happening?

Fun, short adventure, and a taste of Amelia's determined spirit that will stand her in good stead in the days and challenges ahead of her.

New release sample: THE LIVING PROOF GETS THE BLUES

 Pastor Rocky has always believed in putting his knees where his mouth is, so to speak. Prayer vigil teams signed on for one hour at a time, but he made a habit of putting in two shifts in a row. I've always had a hard time praying, mostly because my prayers seem to be more "gimme" and "can I?" than an actual conversation with God. Which, when I really take time to think about it, is kind of lame. Considering the miracle of my whole life, the crazy saves we pulled off, the battles with otherness we have won, my multiple brushes with death, and the fact I'm at least partially on my feet, when I should have spent a greatly shortened life paralyzed and probably on a respirator, you'd think I'd be a lot closer to God, right?

Thank God we had Pastor Rocky to give us the best example possible.

So we headed down the hall to the back doors of the sanctuary, and slipped in to try to find Pastor Rocky, so we could snag him as soon as the chime sounded to end this prayer vigil shift. The door creaked, sounding like a haunted house soundtrack. I was glad I was sitting down. It put me lower, about three-quarters hidden by the last pew in the row. Poor Daniel didn't have that protection.

Only one head raised up, and the tall, thickening body it belonged to got up almost before I saw Pastor Rocky's face. He had a long walk from the front pew, and he tipped his head slightly to the right and stared at us as he came down the right-hand aisle to the back of the sanctuary to meet us. He licked his lips, and for a moment looked like he might say something. Then he shrugged, gestured for us to follow him, and led us out of the sanctuary.

New release sample: THE LIVING PROOF GETS THE BLUES

 

When we came in the back door by the church office, Vivian was hurrying down the hall away from us, trying to keep up with Gabe McIntosh, our head custodian. All the lights were off in the office, but not in the hallway. Okay, so now we knew how Sherwood was keeping Father Marty from reaching Pastor Rocky before we did.

"They're kind of scary, you know?" Daniel murmured, as we slowed and watched Vivian and Gabe vanish down the hallway, probably heading for the utility room at the other end of the church. I knew all the back rooms and hallways and storage rooms, from part-time custodian jobs in high school.

"Yeah, but it's good to have them on our side," I said, and turned my phone to look at the blank screen and make a face, betting myself that Sherwood was listening and watching.

I was right. A cartoon of Groucho Marx flashed on my screen, waggling his huge eyebrows and his big cigar, and saying, "With friends like these, who needs enemas?"

Daniel laughed, then he sighed and straightened his shoulders and looked around. "So, what do we do? Just go in and hope he isn't busy?" 

"Doing what? No computer, no phone." I checked my watch. "He's probably still in the sanctuary with the prayer vigil team. The current shift isn't done for another fifteen, twenty minutes."

Off the Bookshelf: A FAREWELL TO CHARMS, by Molly Harper

 

Mystic Bayou

In fact, the LAST Mystic Bayou story. Noooooo! Say it isn't so!

Mystic Bayou is a guilty pleasure. So much fun, mixed with fantasy and mystery and a touch of danger and humor. Kind of snarky in places, too.

The book details page on this audiobook says "magnificent series finale," so it must be true -- magnificent as well as ... finale. *sigh*

Eva appeared in Jon and Leah's story, and Alex showed up when Cordelia came to town, so readers/listeners have known about them for  a little while. Now, they both get center stage.

He's Mister GQ, fashion plate, bureaucrat, and she's kind of a Cajun-style Wonder Woman. She literally can and does pick him up and has to be careful not to break him when passion takes over. But they have a lot in common, despite appearances. Both of them have pasts they carry scars and regrets over. Both have to work things out with their parents. Both have to forgive. Both can't believe that the one they've been secretly sighing over wants them. Sounds like a match made in heaven, right?

Well, yeah, except Eva's family problems come near to killing Alex. And there's this cursed sapphire threatening to mess them up at some point. And Alex doesn't really fit in with the "gang" that has built up in the previous stories ... but he'll learn for Eva's sake.

*sigh* Fun story, but with a bitter sweet aftertaste, knowing it's the last one .... well, until I get enough books cleared out of my to-be-listened-to queue that I can justify pulling out the first story and start listening all over again. So much fun. Thanks, Molly, for the fun ride! 

New release sample: THE LIVING PROOF GETS THE BLUES

 The last article was a list of the dead. With a few sentences talking about what they had been doing before they reunited for the concert tour.

Pastor Rocky and Father Marty were listed near the top.

The article gave their current names, the names they had been using when they were with the band, and where they ministered now.

I read the information to Daniel, and my voice broke a little when I got to "Neighborlee Gospel Church, Neighborlee, Ohio."

"But they're not dead," he said. "So who died in the crash?"

I flipped through my phone, moving backward through the screens of information Sherwood had put there, then increased the view to navigate through the article. I was reading when Daniel pulled into the church parking lot, and while he unloaded my chair and brought it around to the door.

"It doesn't say anything about getting lookalikes or body doubles or whatever to fill in for them," I said, when I couldn't delay any longer, and slid out of the truck to settle in my chair.

"Sherwood?" Daniel said.

"You want it sent to Pastor Rocky's computer?" he asked through my phone.

"Please."

New release sample: THE LIVING PROOF GETS THE BLUES

 

We got to a stop sign and Daniel leaned over to look. I showed him the phone. All I had to do was hold it, while Sherwood scrolled through the images. Pastor Rocky and Marty scowled at the camera, looking like they did in the pictures from the band's glory days. Except …

Except they were wearing current clothes. None of the grunge rock outfits. Black t-shirts and jeans and cowboy boots and black leather jackets. Their hair was short -- well, Father Marty had hair, period. The man I had been running into when he practiced with Pastor Rocky's retro band wore the typical Friar Tuck haircut, glossy dome with a straggly fringe. In all the pictures I had seen from Pastor Rocky's boxes of memorabilia, they had had long hair, past their shirt pockets -- if they wore shirts at all.

"This is a story that was slated to release next week," Sherwood said, when Daniel sat up and continued driving to the church.

"How did you get hold of it ahead of time?" Daniel asked.

"I didn't. It was released in reaction to an accident last night. Read."

My phone showed a series of newspaper articles and police reports and online news bytes. Sherwood didn't give me time to read much more than the headlines and a few of the first lines. I didn't want to read more than that, because the headlines and lead lines told me the whole story.

Magna Magma's tour bus had collided head-on with a semi hauling a fuel tanker. There were no survivors.

Okay, we were going to comfort Pastor Rocky on the tragic deaths of his former friends. So why were we trying to get there before Father Marty? 

My phone display stopped on the final article, and I realized I was wrong. There was a whole lot more to last night's accident.

Off the Bookshelf: HOW TO ADD HUMOR TO YOUR NOVEL, by Lisa Wells

 

Homework for the craft book club at Great Lakes Fiction Writers.

As Saavik said to Admiral Kirk: "Humor. A difficult concept."

You know what's even more difficult? GOBS of homework, to stretch your humor muscles (Didn't know you had one, did you? Well, what do you think is attached to your funny bone?) (On another note, it seems some people lack both a funny bone and humor muscles. Too bad. Humor should be considered a survival skill in life, not just in writing!)

The author gives lots of examples for all the different kinds of humor and approaches to assembling a joke or humorous scene or creating one-liners. And how to apply different kinds of humor and techniques for different situations. And for every chapter she has exercises -- aka HOMEWORK!

This is one of those books where you read it through to get the general idea of what's there, and a good idea of what you need to focus on. Then you go back and do the homework, study the examples, and accept the fact that it's not a one-and-done. You gotta exercise those humor muscles constantly, to make it work.

I must confess, I voted for a different book for the club to read last month, but I'm kinda-sorta glad the majority chose this one. Useful! And it reinforced my own assessment of my own brand of humor. Snark. Pointing out the insanity of the world around me, and trying not to whimper too loudly when it's proved again and again that I -- speaking through my POV character -- am the only sane person for miles around .... Maybe!

New release sample: THE LIVING PROOF GETS THE BLUES

 Daniel was just getting out of his truck when I reached the parking lot. Oh, great, we were supposed to have an editorial department meeting. How did I manage to forget that little detail? Maybe because I was trying to forget anything having to do with Daniel, thanks to the weird looks he had been giving me ever since we celebrated Angela and Ethan's wedding, and she threw her bridal bouquet right into my face.

"Hey, no running out on me," Daniel called, laughing, as I sped down the ramp in my wheelchair.

This was one of those days when I was even more furious with all the damage done during the whole doppelganger situation this past winter and spring. My healing had been set back by years. I should have been leaving the office on my own two legs, and maybe even run to my Jeep and jump in. No delays to get out of my chair and fold it up and sling it into the back seat.

"Pastor Rocky needs me," I said, and nearly ran him over, when he stepped into my path.

At the last moment, Daniel pivoted aside and grabbed the handles of my chair and turned me toward his truck. He nearly tipped me out of my chair, but I caught on to what he was doing, and levered myself up onto my feet in time to avoid doing a face-plant against his passenger door. I was in and pulling the door closed by the time he had my chair in the back of his truck and was getting into the driver's seat.

Then I turned on my phone and told Sherwood to fill us in.

"Read this," he said, and kindly took over my phone so it switched over to a music website devoted to rock'n'roll bands.

It featured Magna Magma's reunion tour. Sherwood only let me read a few paragraphs before he took over again, blowing up several pictures. 

"That's Pastor Rocky. But it's not." I squinted at the images. "And there's Father Marty. But --" I swallowed, fighting a queasy sensation. "But that's not them. They're … younger."

New release sample: THE LIVING PROOF GETS THE BLUES

 

It was the day after the third reunion concert. I knew the schedule because Pastor Rocky tried to stay on top of things, to have us praying for his former friends. He had a bad feeling about the whole situation, how the whole concert came together, the nastiness of the Lavaheads, and especially how the organizers for the tour had found him. How difficult was it to get through three false identities to track someone down?

Sherwood contacted me at work. It was a Tuesday, paper delivery day, and I had just gotten to my desk. My computer screen lit up with his face on it. Pretty neat trick, since I hadn't turned on my computer yet. The little light in the camera lit up and he looked around the office before speaking. Which was a relief, because I was bent down to pick up a pack of flag stickers I had knocked onto the floor and didn't see him watching me for a few seconds.

"Lanie, Pastor Rocky is going to need you," Sherwood said. "Right away. I have bad news to give him."

"What kind of bad news?" Honestly, my first thought was that Stephen Grandstone was on his way to the church with a car loaded with Magna Magma memorabilia and a couple machine guns.

"According to the news, Pastor Rocky should be dead."

 "What?" Somehow, I managed not to shriek that word.

"Just go. I'll tell you in the car. Father Marty is reading the news on his computer right now, and we want Pastor Rocky to know before he tells him." 

"Okay, I'm going." I turned my wheelchair away from my desk, and nearly forgot to grab my backpack, which I had slung onto my desk to unload it. Kind of needed my backpack, because it had my keys.

Off the Bookshelf: THE MIDNIGHT ORCHESTRA, by Jessica Khoury

 

Audiobook, Audible exclusive

Narrated by Suzy Jackson

Mystwick School series

This second book in the Mystwick School series takes up just days after the end of the first book. Amelia thinks she's finally settling in, she's finally made a place for herself and she belongs. She's looking forward to learning to use her newly discovered magical gift of Composing.

Then, of course, complications hit her, one by one. First, the other Amelia Jones shows up, miraculously rescued from being shipwrecked. This Mia is not a nice person, especially since she's determined to keep Darby and Amelia from being friends. Then the mysterious Mr. Midnight contacts Amelia by magically appearing notes, summoning her to the Midnight Orchestra. Then her classmates decide to enter a musical competition the school hasn't been able to enter since the grand prize trophy was stolen from them by cheaters. They're depending on Amelia to compose the winning musical spell -- and Amelia finds out that her mother was the composer for that last team.

Amelia's composing teacher, Miss Mott, is something of a free spirit, whose teaching methods leave her confused and frustrated. Especially when one thing after another goes wrong, in school and her life. Pushed to the breaking point, she makes a rash decision, which ends in her owing a huge debt to Mr. Midnight. And he's not above threatening her friends and the school to make sure she pays. Amelia could lose far more than the competition.

Bravisimo!

Snap It All Mystery CLUES

 

THANKS for coming to check out the clues and extra information to solve the Snap It All! mystery.

The information was posted on Thursday, so just scroll down past Friday's blog post, and you'll find that information.

TWO postings. 

Read them both.

GOOD LUCK!!

New release sample: THE LIVING PROOF GETS THE BLUES

 Meanwhile, Stephen Grandstone had started harassing Pastor Rocky.

He knew he had been Drake Abbot, in Magna Magma. How? How did the Grandstones find out anything? Shady sources, at the very least.

Get this: Grandstone wanted an inside exclusive to the reunion of the band. He wanted a reunion concert in Cleveland. Playhouse Square. One of the venues at Cleveland State. The I-X Center. All Pastor Rocky had to do was name a place and date, and he would arrange it.

He got kind of nasty-snippy when Pastor Rocky told him he wasn't in the reunion tour. He accused Pastor Rocky of lying, and then trying to game him and force him into negotiations.

All this was done over the phone. Grandstones had never stepped foot into our church, even when they tried to prove they were the legitimate owners of the building. We suspected any Grandstone who stepped foot onto church property would burst into flames.

The phone calls were a regular occurrence, according to Vivian Holt, our church secretary. At least once a day, six days a week, Stephen Grandstone called and Vivian had to pass him to Pastor Rocky. On Sundays, he called and left a message on the church answering machine, because no one was in the office. 

Then after two months, the phone calls and demands to meet the band and sponsor a concert stopped abruptly.

More clues for the SNAP IT! Mystery ....

 

Here are some questions the investigator asked me, but weren't posted on the Facebook page:

Helpful?

Was he picking on me?

Was he suspicious?

Was I being snippy with my last answer?

You decide!

 

Why was your business card found near the camera bag where the camera was stolen from, Christy said she never saw that one before.

It was windy, we were chasing the dog away from our stuff, and we weren't at the tables constantly. It could have blown off my table, or someone could have come by and picked it up. Maybe whoever took Christy's camera was checking out all our tables to look for something to steal. I'll have to check my inventory list to see if any of my books are missing.

 

Am I correct that you write a variety of genres, including cozy mystery? If you can create an alibi for a character, how do I know I can believe your alibi now?

Yes, I'm a writer, and the smart-alec answer is that I get paid to lie, so if I'm not getting paid, I'm not lying.

The boring answer that won't get me in trouble is that I have no reason to lie. I don't take pictures, I have no need for a camera, I wouldn't know what to do with a big, fancy, complicated camera like a professional uses, and I don't need money that badly that I would steal from a new friend. Or is that protesting too much? Go ask Queen Gertrude.

Snap It All -- CLUES

 

Some things you need to know about problems we had during set-up for the event tonight.

The stray dog was a royal pain. It made the rounds of our tables, walking under the tables, trying to chew on the tablecloths, and nosing at our boxes and bags. It obviously knew Fran was scared of him and kept going back to her table every time the rest of us chased it away from ours. She jumped up on a bench twice when he got too close, and a third time he chased her nearly to the bathroom. We all cheered when Victoria called Parks and Recreation to complain and ask for help, because after all, dogs aren't allowed out without leashes. Still, we had no idea if anyone was coming in response to Victoria's phone call, since she could only leave a message.

For the last 15 to 20 minutes before the event officially started and our guests showed up, we were all scattered, checking our cars, changing our clothes, taking phone calls, and walking in circles trying to get a better wireless signal. We were checking social media for last-minute responses to our posts that the event was about to begin and the "doors" were opening. As far as any of us knew, the pavilion was never left without someone to watch our tables. Still, how could we be sure? We had so much still to do, and we were kind of behind schedule thanks to that dog. A few times we were busy anchoring things down, when the breeze picked up and blew flyers and business cards off the tables.

Then with everything else happening, I got an emergency phone call. Not something I wanted or needed right then.  Some of my writing friends have been having trouble with people posting accusations that they stole other people's stories, and trying to get them banned from Amazon and Goodreads and have their reviews taken down from review sites. I was getting threats from people who claimed some of my books were stolen, but they hadn't followed through yet.

Well, the phone call was from an agent I have been trying to get interested in representing me for about six months now. She had questions about these accusations. It turns out these "trolls" have been contacting various agents, making their accusations. She wanted to ask about several titles that were on the accusation list. No, none of those titles were stolen -- they had been published years ago under different titles. These idiots were accusing me of stealing MY OWN BOOKS, making a few cosmetic changes, and then republishing under a new title.

Yeah, problem solved. Sort of. I hope. We just won't know until she and the other agents being targeted by these trolls take some serious actions of their own. Nice to know we have some powerful people who want to shut up the trolls!

So yeah, I was kind of distracted when I was busy with that phone call.

BUT -- not so distracted that I didn't see Fran go running into the bathroom when that dang stray dog showed up again. I was about halfway through the phone call, and pacing back and forth in the parking lot by the bathroom, trying to keep the phone signal strong, when she peered out and asked me something about the dog. I wasn't sure what she was asking, but I didn't see it, so I tried to signal her it was all clear, while trying to listen to the agent.

We were all re-gathering in the pavilion when Christy's husband showed up to make a "we're ready to get started" video, to post. That was when we realized the camera was missing.

(REMEMBER: "Facts" presented during the mystery are not actual, real-life facts, but made up for the sake of the mystery.....)

WONDER WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? There's a mystery to be solved, with a PRIZE to be awarded Friday, May 6. Check this page on Facebook, and get to work!

https://www.facebook.com/groups/869333297800405

Come Join the Fun -- A Mystery Party

Snap It All -- The Camera is Gone

A Mystery Event on Facebook

Link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/869333297800405

Join us starting 5:30pm EST Thursday, meet the vendors at this event (and the suspects ...) and start gathering clues as you listen to the investigator interrogate us. A valuable camera goes missing just a short time before an event at the park -- who took it, and why?

 What else are you going to do on a chilly May evening -- especially if you're tired after Cinco de Mayo? (and we won't even mention all the fun you had on Wednesday on Star Wars Day  .... May the Fourth be With You ....)

Check back here during the party, when I'll post some confessions, details I don't tell the investigator ... until pressed. 

Oh, by the way, did I mention there was a PRIZE?

And here's the INTRO VIDEO I made for the party.

New release sample: THE LIVING PROOF GETS THE BLUES

 About three weeks before the Sunday school picnic, several boys reported to Angela that Tass had asked them to take pictures inside Divine's Emporium. He would pay them to go into every room in the shop and take pictures of the contents. One of the boys asked what he wanted the pictures for, and Tass told him, with a straight face, that he was on a mission from God to rid our town of "evil influences." If the boys took "evil goods" from the shop when he asked, they would be paid even more. When one boy said that sounded like stealing, Tass told him it wasn't stealing if it was a mission from God.

The boys were smart enough to know there wasn't enough money in the world to convince them to steal from Angela. Taking something without paying for it was stealing, no matter how much the slick-suited, big-voiced, crazy-eyed man twisted words around. The boys went straight to Angela and told her. She called Gordon, who confronted Tass.

I was so proud of Gordon. Tass got all self-righteous and snarly. He spit when he got really wound up, and declared that his mission from God overruled everything that mere mortals might say. Gordon snapped out one of my favorite lines from Ladyhawke. "Sir, I talk to God all the time, and He's never mentioned you."

Tass threatened the destruction of his soul. Gordon just smiled at him and told him his soul had already been given to Jesus, and Tass had no say in what happened to it. Then he took the body camera recording and gave it to Chief Tanner, putting the whole encounter on record. 

From that day, Tass went on the offensive -- as if he wasn't offensive already? -- against Divine's Emporium and the Neighborlee Police.

NEW RELEASE!

 New release TODAY.

The 13th and FINAL book in the Neighborlee, Ohio contemporary fantasy series.

Available in paper, ebook, and audiobook.

The Living Proof Gets the Blues

 

 

The guardians face their greatest dilemma, when a New Age cult threatens to drive the Grandstones out of Neighborlee -- and take their place. Better the devil they know than the one they don't?

 

Saving Neighborlee Children's Home from foreclosure, and stopping an invasion from otherworldly forces could all depend on Pastor Rocky "getting the band back together." Problem: everyone else died in a fiery crash.

 

Or did they?

 

Multiple enemy forces unite to attack the town of Neighborlee, attempting to turn Pastor Rocky into their newest weapon.

 

Big mistake.