Off the Bookshelf: RIVALS! FRENEMIES WHO CHANGED THE WORLD, by Scott McCormick

 

Audible exclusive, Audible original

Narrated by Prentice Onayemi, Samantha Turret, Khristine Hvam, Gabriel Vaughan, Josh Hurley

This is the side of history you don't get in school. The rivalries between political leaders, academics, and royals -- basically people who were smart and should have known better -- but let their pride and hurt feelings and childish natures get in the way. Or they didn't stand up to political and other types of pressures, and did what was expedient, and nobody had the intelligence or tact or maturity to apologize! Dinosaur bone collectors and scientists, Founding Fathers, British Royal Family drama.

This reminds me of Fractured Flickers, a show my brother loves, produced by the same creative insane geniuses who gave us Rocky and Bullwinkle, taking silent movies, adding sound effects, dubbing in dialog that was most definitely not part of the original script, and then creating a new story entirely. Totally silly and fractured.

This is basically fractured history -- showing the cracks and the crackpots and the stupidity of real people, and bringing the larger-than-life characters down to size. Bravo! I hope there are more like this out there. Fun!

Off the Book Shelf: THE DRAGON SQUISHER, by Scott McCormick

 

Audible, Audible Original

Warning: this is a Tolkein parody like no parody I've ever heard before. Not that I've actually listened to or read all that many, but ... *snort* *giggle* *groan*

Poor Nigel, the guy who wants so much to be popular and successful with the girls and impress people, with a smart mouth and a talent for making all the wrong choices. He finally messes up so badly he gets sent off to military school. One bright spot: he's finally getting away from too-perfect Lance .... but Lance who was there and participated in the prank that went so terribly wrong, so everybody in their village hates Nigel ... he turns himself in, essentially volunteering to spend the rest of his life in the military. With Nigel. They're surrounded by drill sergeants who hate them and idiots and clueless commanders. Then war with the Gorks is declared. Nigel has been working so hard to get himself thrown out of military school, so he doesn't have to go to war ... and just when he isn't trying, he messes up so bad he and Lance get banished. And sent on a quest that makes no sense.

Why do I say it's a parody of Tolkein? Well, there are the magical panties (9 rings of power), the Cufflinks of Doom (one ring to rule them all), Lord Smoron (Sauron), and the enormous sniffing nose in the void that keeps getting closer every time Nigel uses the amulet of power (the Eye of Sauron). Oh yeah, and a Halfling named Elbow, who went on an epic quest 2,000 years ago ... but if Nigel and Lance and their Gork ally, Eldrack, have anything to do with it, the quest will never have happened ... maybe.

Not bad for a trio of fourteen-year-olds. What kind of trouble will they get into next?