Wednesday, May 15, 2019

Excerpt: FOR SALE: WEDDING DRESS. NEVER USED.


"What do you do, Eve? What's your major?" Pastor Tom asked.

"She's only a sophomore. She's still too busy getting her requirements out of the way," Mrs. Carleone said, with a little laugh, as if Pastor Tom had wasted his breath asking.

"Eve is majoring in administration," Andy said. "She's been doing summer camps and kids' crusades and snow camps for Allen Michaels since -- what? -- middle school?"

That grin on his face made me think he was proud of me. The next astonishing deduction was that to be proud of me, he had to feel...possessive?

Tonia and I later discussed the whole weird day. She theorized Mrs. Carleone was either trying to condition me to brainless slavery or scare me away. Why would she try to scare me away when I wasn't interested in Andy, and he certainly hadn't expressed that kind of long-term interest in me?

Back to lunch: Ginger said it sounded like I had a full-time ministry waiting for me when I graduated. Mrs. Carleone countered with the old "Not if she gets married" line. So dummy me, I had to blurt that I had no boyfriend, no plans for marriage, and all signs indicated God wanted me to stay single.

"I've never had a date in my whole life," I added.

"What do you call this?" Pastor Tom gestured at Andy and me on one side of the table.

"Church isn't a date. And I thought the whole team was coming today."

Andy snorted. His face got red. "My fault," he said, when his mother demanded an explanation. "You should have seen the look on Eve's face when she came out to my car and saw we were all alone. Sorry -- guess I forgot to tell you it was just going to be us."

"I think that's charming." Mrs. Carleone smiled, her first genuine, warm expression all day. Probably because she realized I had no plans to drag Andy to the altar.

At that point, all I wanted was a silent ride back to school. The day couldn't get any worse.

I was wrong.

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